cant stop vomiting today

On Instagram, in regards to Sarah McBride being a reactionary, Zionist piece of libshit, I stated

Reminder that a white person being a part of a marginalized group does NOT absolve them of their whiteness and KKKolonizer mentality

Fittingly enough, a white trans woman responded, “People who unironically use Maoist Standard English need to be studied.”

I didn’t even put up with it; I just straight-up blocked.

It’s pretty obvious what’s going on here. Trans cracKKKer is upset that my very real and true statement struck a nerve, but SShe has no way of responding without taking the mask off and putting the hood on, so what SShe did instead was poke fun at me for using MSE. Basically, it’s an ad hominem SShe used to KKKompenSSate for her being a SSalty KKKraKKKKKKer.

What’s even more telling about this is that MSE intends to sprinkle humor into statements regardless, but usage of it obviously doesn’t lessen the accuracy of what I’m saying.

Even for forms of bigotry not directly related to race, marginalized white people in leftist spaces seem to seriously have far less skepticism than I do as an intersectional black person in leftist spaces.

For instance, as a black trans person, not only do I expect white people in leftist spaces to have racist brainworms, but I expect cis people in leftist spaces to have transphobic brainworms as well.

However, it seems like white trans people in leftist spaces, on the other hand, not only ignore their own racist brainworms, but it seems that so many of them just all willy-nilly assume that your average cisgender person in leftist spaces is going to be totally accepting of trans people and not have any strong transphobic brainworms whatsoever.

I find that they don’t have enough skepticism, but I do believe that I’m on the opposite end of this issue, in that I have too much skepticism. It’s to a point where I feel that somebody being white and/or cis in and of itself is a major red flag for me.

A kind-of-an-example-of-this-but-not-really I recall is when a user on Hexbear posted a thread about SSouth KKKorean gender troubles, and they referenced the 4B movement and praised it as some kind of “epic, based WAOW! feminist movement,” and many trans users were commenting on this post praising 4B as well. After it came out that 4B is racist, bioessentialist, and just flat-out awful in so many ways, people were cringing at themselves.

What’s my point? Well, if I hear about any female separatist movement, especially in a place like Occupied KKKorea, my first thought isn’t going to be, “Wow, this is epic girl power and a powerful middle finger to patriarchy!” Instead, my first thought is going to be, “Let me research this group and find out about all of the terrible shit that they support, and while I’m at it, let me acknowledge how undialectical their movement is, as it has no demands and it is rooted in zero feminist theory.”

The fact that womanists have pushed against white feminists doing this shit in the United States educates my skepticism very well here.

I watch one video on that Johnny Somali guy and now Youtube keeps pushing me videos that sell a narrative about black expats being the problem Asian countries face. Conveniently ignoring the massive amount of white sexpats that have an affinity for girls under 18.

I don’t know if I’m just a bitter old man already but whenever I hear other grown black men whine and complain about being a nerd I find it irksome. Like bro I get it, I was bullied and shit too. I feel for you I really do, but at the same time, we are grown. Just like whatever shit you like man. It isn’t a big deal. No one cares. It’s fine, like what you like, do your thing. It also doesn’t make you special, everyone likes nerdshit now.

It’d be different we were in like middle-school or high school, but my brother we have 401ks now, just buy your little figures and shut the fuck up.

it kills me when leftists try to make things a popularity contest, real theater kid energy.

Being a vegan of color has made white people even more untrustworthy in my eyes.

White carnist “leftists” are often on some white savior shit where they try to paint veganism as reactionary, racist, and colonialist, and when a non-white vegan disagrees with them, they show their true colors.

I have had some horrid mask-off moments with white carnists who do this.

I noticed something with my immigrant friends, the ones who try to integrate into “American” culture tend to latch on to white pop culture. Like a lot of them talk to me about friends, Seinfeld, and all those white shows from the 90s. I assume these were the shows and stuff that exported internationally just as part of white culture being dominant so it’s not really a fault to them, but I’ve had to explain a little too many times how I’ve never seen those shows and have no idea what they’re referencing. I don’t expect them to know Black culture nor be able to pick it up properly either but it’s just been an interesting thing I’ve noticed, white supremacy goes far.

adult white queers who base their identity around Greek mythology are the actual worse. like 90% if them are white supremacist. i will not fuck with them, I genuinely despise them. please grow the fuck up and research any other part of history. if you can tell me about how gay ancient greek and rome were but not any other country you are a queer white supremacist.

IM SO HOT, IM SO CUTE, IM SO SEXYYYY (sure a lil chubby ) BUT GOD IM SO PRETTY, I LOVE MY LIPS, AND HAIR AND HOW BIG MY NOSE IS

I find it hilarious that white people are telling me that "I am going to be sorry " for voting green party as if I’m not already sorry to have been born in a country which will never accept me.

People like us have been facing threat , certainly from the time that we become a sexual threat or quarry to white men. My life has been war from when I was 12 years old until I forced them to stop messing with me.

So I can’t help but laugh in the face of some white dude who has never felt threatened in his life telling me that I am not accurately assessing the forces arrayed against me.

There’s something eerily depressing about the fact that even a “good and expected to be much better than average” leftist space like Hexbear is still incapable of being truly respectful to POC.

It makes me wonder if there is truly any hope for the whites to be decent, even in leftist spaces.

I’ve been quite depressed all morning, but definitely for more reasons than just Hexbear being this degree of racist that utterly shocked me. I think it’s still getting to me because I’m in such a shock that, for the first time, a Hexbear post led me into a deep depression that made me cry and have to seek mental health support just to calm down enough to go to sleep.

I never thought this would’ve happened.

Anyone finds the over-use of “fascism” absolutely tiring?

Like genuinely it feels not only intellectually dishonest but delusional. Just because an individual disagrees with your western sensibilities does not mean they are fascist.

If you were to be born in the Global South on average you will live 10 years less than if you were born in the Global North.

In other terms, if let’s say you, an average Global South citizen, live to around 70 years old, that means Global North citizens would live 14% longer.

But this apparently is not “fascism” (or insert any Big Bad buzzword), just the “normal state of affairs” of the world.

Westerners surely care about your “rights”, maybe in it’s name, in it’s superficiality, in the abstract, but never in reality, because it obstructs the very fundamentals of the capitalist system, accumulation. In this case, the accumulation of literal years that you live in this finite world.

Yo, this mass-deportation talk is scaring the fuck out of me. After working at various immigrants rights orgs, it seriously sounded hyperbolized—cuz like, I know the racist-ass sentiment to mass-deport is strong in America, but I kept thinking that it’s an impossible task, logistically.

But then lately I’ve been seeing all the “fuck around find out” lib-fash shit and it’s starting to seem like a feasible task. Like how the fuck could it not be if the libs are expressly saying they’ll turn a blind fucking eye.

I’m so stressed right now it’s unreal

The final test is coming next week, this will make or break me. If I pass I can move onto revenue service training and actually start serving the public. If I fail I slow the entire class down and risk getting terminated.

The ability to test air brakes, properly pre-trip inspect a bus, and actually drive it will demonstrate to the county, state, and fed that I can actually serve the public without being a liability.

Not only that but I’m banking on this one risky career change to be the last one and successful. I am running thin financially and I need to pass to become a real driver, actually help the community, and make a decent earning.

My family and friends are watching, the stakes are extremely high.

I’m trying not to sob