For years now, I’ve been watching most of the trick-or-treaters go to the house on one side of me, take one look at my house and walk right past it, and then go to the house on the other side.

I had no clue why. Maybe they were scared of my house or thought I’d give cheap candy (my house is a bit of a fixer-upper)? I completed my “curb appeal” projects; didn’t help.

Maybe they thought nobody was home? I not only have the porch light on, but also have the living room TV on, clearly visible through the (open!) front window, and it makes no difference.

Maybe they think I’m not participating (despite the clear signal of the porch light and jack-o’-lantern)? I put up a bunch of Halloween decorations this year, and it still didn’t help!


Well, I finally found out the reason, after hearing one kid scouting ahead yelling to tell his friends to skip my house: “there’s no bowl on the porch!”

…You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.

Yep, unlike my neighbors, who had apparently just left unattended bowls of candy on their porches, I was actually sitting there inside the house, with the bowl of candy, waiting for kids to knock or ring the doorbell before I opened the door and handed it out. You know, like how trick-or-treating is supposed to work.

This is ridiculous. Kids these days are skipping viable houses with candy because they can’t be bothered to actually knock on the damn door and say “trick or treat” to the person who answers? Residents are expected to be too lazy to answer the door, and just put out the candy without even receiving the traditional threat first? With no actual interaction with the neighbors for the kids to show off their costumes, what’s even the point‽

I finally stuck a sign on the door saying “yes, you have to knock or ring for candy!” and that helped, but even then, some kids are still skipping my house because they apparently can’t be bothered to read the sign.

  • superkret@feddit.org
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    21 days ago

    My guess is, the kids aren’t supposed to knock and interact with strangers anymore cause their parents are scared.
    Some places, trick or treating has been replaced with a group of parents driving to a parking lot and their kids going from truck to truck.

    • Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      21 days ago

      The latter has been popular in rural areas too for years, because the alternative is driving your kids from house to house. I would have made it to like 5 houses a year max if I’d tried to walk as a kid (and probably got run over, lol).

      • AnarchoSnowPlow@midwest.social
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        21 days ago

        We’re semi-rural (multi acre lots often with houses set almost at the back of lots), this was my first Halloween out here, I was following the kids with a car cause it was cold and snowy. But apparently the other parents in the neighborhood all hang out and set up a flatbed trailer with a fire pit, lawn chairs, and beer just being hauled around by a UTV. I need to learn how to make friends as an adult.

      • scarabic@lemmy.world
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        21 days ago

        In a rural area, that makes sense. I can also understand if a school or parent group organizes this for kids who live in unsafe areas. But it’s perhaps even more popular in affluent areas because the paranoia there is just that intense.

    • ThePowerOfGeek@lemmy.world
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      21 days ago

      I just got back from taking one of my kids trick or treating with his friends. It was great. My wife and I got to walk and chat with the other parents while all of our kids knocked on doors and shouted “trick or treat!”. Lots of friendly, generous, nice people. And lots of shouted reminders from us for the kids to not walk on people’s front lawns, to say thank you, to be careful crossing the quiet roads. There were so many other kids out too. It was pretty crazy, but in a good way. About half of the houses were giving out candy in some way or other, with only about a quarter having an un-monitored bowl.

      Then on the way home we drove past a church that was having a ‘trunk or treat’ in their parking lot. That just looked sad. There was no excitement for going up to the really cool houses that were decked out in amazing props and decorations. There was no need to hone analytical skills to determine which houses were giving out candy and which ones probably weren’t. Just going very short distances from one car to the next getting candy. My kid asked why they do that. I said it’s probably because they are a closed community who don’t really want to associate with ‘outsiders’. Give me the conventional experience over that all day every day!

    • Altima NEO@lemmy.zip
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      21 days ago

      They’re doing trunk or treat now, when they go to a planned event hosted by businesses during the sunlight hours. I guess it’s still fun, but it loses the neighborhood charm.

    • nocturne@sopuli.xyz
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      My town does this at the city square. It started with all of the businesses around the square getting together to give out candy. Then the next year more people showed up for it. Then last year the city took over, did no advertising and almost no one showed up for it. Heck we went to another area to give out candy because we did not know. This year the city did it again, with zero advertising. There was a decent turn out for kids, but very few people giving out candy.

      Our town is small and old, there are huge gaps between houses, much more so than when we lived in the city.

  • DrownedRats@lemmy.world
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    20 days ago

    Leave a bowl out with a sign that says “if the bowl is empty, please knock.” You don’t even have to fill the bowl with anything.

      • ristoril_zip@lemmy.zip
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        20 days ago

        hey look buddy I’ve got some amazing advice for OP over here but I had another OP call me 10 minutes ago asking for the exact same advice so I’m gonna need you to make a decision right away.

  • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 ℹ️@yiffit.net
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    They go for the unattended bowls so they can just take it all for themselves. I dressed up as a decoration scarecrow one or two years after I was too old to trick or treat myself and held a bowl of candy in my lap out on the porch. Every kid that attempted to take the entire bowl, got a scare as I stood up and shouted scary things like “TAKE THE BOWL, I TAKE YOUR SOUL!”

  • classic@fedia.io
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    21 days ago

    Give out the best candy possible to the few who come by. The rumor of the amazing trove will spread. But then “run out” early so that some of them will miss out and learn the lesson for next year

    • Dran@lemmy.world
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      21 days ago

      King size candy bars, give out 2 to each. Everyone always loved that guy

    • GraniteM@lemmy.world
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      20 days ago

      Buying boxes of full-sized candy isn’t even that much more expensive than the fun-sized, and the psychological impact is immediate and dramatic. Every year I hear kids go “Woah, big candy bars!”

          • ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de
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            20 days ago

            Are you an idiot? You’re showing a picture per ounce. Do you know how Halloween works? You aren’t handing out candy by the ounce. You can buY a 300 piece Hershey Halloween candy bag for $25. Each kid can take 3 and you have enough for about 100 kids. How many regular size candy bars are you going to get for $25? Here’s a hint- it’s a lot less than 100.

            • wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world
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              20 days ago

              Guys, we found the dunce that failed 3rd grade math. They figured out how to use a computer, finally.

              The point of this entire thread is to solve the problem/attract trick or treaters. Not giving out bullshit size bars is a solid way to do that. And the number of those who visit OPs house are low anyway, so it doesn’t fucking matter that ‘bigger means less quantity, das tooped herpaderp’.

              OP is trying to make kids enjoy the event, and the bean counter over here is like ‘we could save money by providing a shittier, smaller product, but more of it - though less overall compared to the standard, shh, nobody will know that - where is my promotion, boss?’.

              To be both incompetent and a smug jerk is impressive though, that’s a skill that will get you places. Not pleasant places, but places.

              • ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de
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                20 days ago

                My response was strictly to the guy above me trying to say giving out full size bars doesn’t cost much more. Learn to read the thread order.

  • EatATaco@lemm.ee
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    21 days ago

    At my house we get north of 200 kids every year it’s decent outside. Sometimes over 250. We’re talking about a kid every minute for the 3.5 hours we do it.

    I just set up a table outside, invite a few friends over, drink some beers and give kids candy as they show up. Fuck having to answer the door every minute for 3.5 hours.

    My older neighbors complained that the kids don’t have to come up to the front door and are skipping their house because I sit outside. I felt a little guilty, but honestly sitting outside (it it’s cold I get a fire pit going, not tonight tho) is much nicer. One older couple followed my lead this year and agreed. So I’m over it now. Welcome to the new world.

    • XeroxCool@lemmy.world
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      21 days ago

      I do the same, minus the fire pit and friends but add in a costume. I’ve been a drunk pirate lately. I used to jump scares, but I find this routine more fun because, apparently, everyone is on edge and creep scares are jsit as easy

    • jordanlund@lemmy.world
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      21 days ago

      I’d sit outside with a table, candy, and a sign that says “You HAVE to say trick or treat, change my mind!”

      • EatATaco@lemm.ee
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        20 days ago

        Yeah it’s a lot of fun. I had a few adults that were there the whole time, but then a bunch of other neighbors/friends wandered in and out throughout the night. Probably had a total of about 10 different people hanging out.

  • toynbee@lemmy.world
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    20 days ago

    The last time I left a bowl on my porch, literally the first group that came took all the candy and threw the bowl into my lawn. It disincentivized from doing so again.

  • floofloof@lemmy.ca
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    21 days ago

    I put a bowl out once. The first kid that came emptied the whole lot into his bag and I had nothing left. So now I keep it inside and if they don’t knock it’s their loss and I get treats.

    • aramis87@fedia.io
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      21 days ago

      I had a doctor’s appointment on Halloween a few years ago. I was getting ready to go out, I put out a bowl of candy (nice mix of different chocolates) and went back inside to grab my purse and my test results for the doctor. I was inside for maybe 45 seconds? During which time I heard a couple kids come up to the porch, say something like “What do you think?”, and a slight scuffling sound. When I exited the house about 20 seconds later, they’d scooped the entire bowl clean and disappeared.

      • XeroxCool@lemmy.world
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        21 days ago

        I knew I’d miss it this year. Honestly, just didn’t decorate so no candy. It got me thinking though. Maybe something like an automatic pet feeder can curtail the greedy little shits. Obviously, the feeder would have to be out of reach.

  • Jeena@piefed.jeena.net
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    21 days ago

    That’s just how economy works. Anyway I always hated to interact with strangers and still do.

  • SwordandArt@lemmy.world
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    20 days ago

    It’s a holdover from Covid. It isn’t some glaring indictment of “kids these days”. The social contract changed with Covid and will take time to go back or maybe never does.

    • MirthfulAlembic@lemmy.world
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      Yeah, in my area trunk or treat is the main reason for no trick or treaters these days. It’s a very urban area, so getting a lot of candy on foot would be easy, but walking around a parking lot is way quicker. It seems to be what most parents prefer also, so I think it’s here to stay.

      • jpreston2005@lemmy.world
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        I loathe trunk or treat. It’s not the same as trick or treating, it’s cheating. When I was young the only way I got a bunch of candy was to run all over the neighborhood, and then run to the other neighborhoods to squeeze in more. I was out and about, acting the fool, where chicanery abounds. I’d end up at home, exhausted at the end of the night.

        Today’s kids walk around a parking lot. It’s just not the same.

        When we were kids halloween was the best. As an adult, there was nothing more I looked forward to than handing out candy, seeing costumes, scaring some kids with all my decorations. But now it’s all sanitized and boiled down into the something as ludicrous as walking around a parking lot asking for handouts from cars. What, are they just prepping the nations children for a life of panhandling? Joking aside, it’s just not as fun for anyone involved. I don’t want to drive somewhere and decorate the fucking trunk of my car (especially when I decorated my house already?), and the kids don’t want to walk around a parking lot!

        Trunk or treat is the worst solution to a problem that doesn’t exist.

        • MirthfulAlembic@lemmy.world
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          20 days ago

          It takes a lot of the magic out of it. I’m sure a bit of this is rose-colored glasses, but it was a really neat experience as a kid. The entire neighborhood was out in the streets, people got to know their neighbors, and you felt like you were part of something. These days​, it feels spooky due to how empty it is besides cars.

        • VerdantSporeSeasoning@lemmy.ca
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          20 days ago

          We went to one of the several trunk or treats in our town. I chose one of the less busy ones so my kid could understand what the massive downtown one would be like if she wanted to do that. We waited in line from trunk to trunk for a whole hour, got meh candy, got to get inside emergency vehicles (that was cool), got to see a lot of other people’s costumes (also really fun), but mostly it was waiting. Standing mostly still. And then the advertised time came for it to be over, even as people were still waiting in line, tables and cars all broke down and started leaving us in a sad, barren lot. We went trick or treating for the main event after all, and got excellent candy, saw all kinds of cool houses as we actively walked with a friend for as long as we wanted.

      • MintyAnt@lemmy.world
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        19 days ago

        Not my favorite. I found a neighborhood that others tend to drive to, which I think is most other people’s ideas, so it ends up getting slammed. Which imo would be sort of fun to decorate for

      • Psythik@lemmy.world
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        20 days ago

        “Trunk or treat” LMAO

        Hey everyone, this person kidnaps children.

        edit: What the fuck, people? I was just poking fun at their typo.

    • rekabis@lemmy.ca
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      I have a tube-based distribution system from the second-floor window that I started using during COVID to keep my distance from those plague incubators that came calling, and just never stopped using it.

      I live in a moderately cold climate, and Halloween evening nearly always drops to around -5℃ to 5℃. So it’s much nicer to just sit in a cushy armchair by the window with a warm blanket over my legs and drop candy through the tube. A surprising amount of adults, teens, and tweens are tickled pink by that system, although a lot of little kids need a surprising amount of direction to get their candy.

      And yes, I always drop either two pieces or - for those in dark hoods and carrying scythes - full-sized snickers.

  • luciferofastora@lemmy.zip
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    Ah yes, let’s skip the social part and get right to the obligatory consumption.

    I don’t really care for Halloween, but I don’t actively hate it either. I like seeing kids and parents in cute costumes walking around. To me, the whole point has always been one of social activity, of walking around the neighbourhood and showing off your cool costume and such. You know, the whole “reinforcing horizontal social ties” deal we’ve done since forever.

  • scarabic@lemmy.world
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    That’s sad. We only leave the bowl out during the time we are out trick or treating ourselves. All trick or treating is under fire, it seems. Have you heard of trunk-or-treat? Gah. And even people who live in safe areas will like their kids into a car and go drive to some affluent neighborhood where the decorations are fancier and full size bars are being given out. I greatly value the experience of knocking on my neighbors’ doors and it’s sad to see people discount this community building experience.

    • grue@lemmy.worldOP
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      And even people who live in safe areas will like their kids into a car and go drive

      Yeah, I’m annoyed about that sort of thing, too – albeit more about the car-brained laziness of parents idling a car from house to house instead of parking and walking with their kids, rather than the class issues – but that’s a different rant.

      I greatly value the experience of knocking on my neighbors’ doors and it’s sad to see people discount this community building experience.

      Thanks, you said what I was thinking but struggling to express.

      I think maybe I’ll bring it up with my community association, to see if next year we can’t make some sort of organized effort to encourage door-answering (and communicate that renewed expectation to trick-or-treaters).

      • Emerald@lemmy.world
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        20 days ago

        parents idling a car from house to house instead of parking and walking with their kids

        And they drive like lunatics as well. Lots of them drive at high speeds in the night with kids running around and in a vehicle with poor visibility and don’t yield to pedestrians. I saw this one car last night weave through some pedestrians crossing the street. Like c’mon… this isn’t North Korea. Let them cross the street

    • Whats_your_reasoning@lemmy.world
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      My workplace (which isn’t a preschool, but has preschoolers) floated the idea of doing a “trunk or treat.” But my manager nixed it with the explanation that it was “cringey.”

      I don’t agree with her on much, but I agree with her on that. Instead we decorated the doors in the center and had the kids practice trick-or-treating the proper way.

      • scarabic@lemmy.world
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        20 days ago

        That’s a cool solution! I guess if trunk or treat is the only event a place can do it’s better than nothing but I’m glad to hear you got creative about supporting the old ways :)

  • guacupado@lemmy.world
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    I think you’re looking at it wrong. It’s likely not that kids are too lazy to knock but that your neighbors are too lazy to answer the door. The kids see everyone on the street leaving bowls out and assume that if someone on the street doesn’t have a bowl, then they’re not doing Halloween like everyone else is.

    • Phil_in_here@lemmy.ca
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      That’s not it at all. Literally, my children told me, “I don’t want to go up, I just want to go to the houses with bowls”. But it’s not a lazy thing, it’s a social anxiety thing. We don’t chat with strangers, we don’t make small talk with people we don’t know, we don’t ask people things we can find out without asking people things. We’re socially awkward parents and we have socially awkward children.

      Millennials, the ones who would much rather text than call on the phone their dearest friends and closest relatives, are 35-40 years old. They’re the ones with halloweening children and those kids are just ask averse to face to face interactions with neighborhood residents as we are.

  • Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world
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    21 days ago

    We sit on the porch and pass it out.

    This year we offered candy or pickle. We went through a gallon jar of pickles!

    • statler_waldorf@sopuli.xyz
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      A few years back, I handed out candy for friends while they took their kids around the neighborhood, and a group of kids jokingly asked for potatoes. I obliged and grabbed them each a potato from the pantry.

      When my friends came back, the potato house was apparently the talk of the kids in the neighborhood.

    • Possibly linux@lemmy.zip
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      The pickle thing is weird. I also would be concerned about contamination.

      Do you at least make them say “trick or treat”