I basically just want to know what you’d wish for if you didn’t worry about others. So that’s the real question, but it’s not as catchy. Three wishes for something only for you. If it helps then assume all the other stuff resolves itself.
The rule is spirit of the law. If you wish for something that happens to help others, it’s fine, but if you wish for something with the goal of doing something good for anyone but you, then you’re turned into Elon Musks right thumb (you retain sentience and sapience, but you’re a thumb. No ability to do anything and you don’t control yourself, Elon does, you’re his thumb.)
Example:
Okay: Your mom is sick and you wish for her to be cured, because you would miss your mom.
Not okay: Your mom is sick and you wish for her to be cured because she doesn’t want to be sick.
And don’t try to rules lawyer it, the genie will get you for that too.
Also only three wishes, it’s a limitation on the genie, not a rule. It’s physically incapable of it. It cannot give you more than three wishes, nor can it be made into something that can do that, nor can it make something that can do that, nor can it make something that can turn it into something that can do that.
I want $500
I want a signed picture of LeVar Burton
I want a 6 month supply of Bombay Sapphire
Firstly, let’s define a pocket dimension: a pocket dimension represents a place where time flows at 1/1 trillionth of the time that it does on Earth, I do not age while inside, is activated by intention, has a mjolnir-like capacity to return to my person by intention, death in there would mean being ejected into the real world, and I can choose to be ejected into the real world via intention.
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A pocket dimension in the form of an fire opal ring in which I get to live as a protagonist in a magical battle world. It is replete with narrative direction that is perfectly suited to me, compelling enemies, larger than life combat, incredibly high threshold for skill expression in magic, arcanologically infinite sustainability of resources, and space for creative solutions. It places me central to the conflict and progress such that I am capable of pushing the world forward by solving problems and interacting with people. It is light-hearted like Pokemon as opposed to grimdark like Warhammer.
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A pocket dimension in the form of an ornate silver band in which I can activate a debug menu of real life. It has a UI, but can also be controlled like a lucid dream. I can play through contrived scenarios with people. I can pluck them from real life or create them myself. I can study with teachers and compete against peers of my choosing. I can choose slices of time and space from Earth’s past to see what happened. My own avatar can be modified in size, shape, age, and engage in noclip. I can fly or teleport. The dimension has an automaton that can be summoned to help me think through what would be useful to interrogate about situations. It has a repository of save files for situations and knowledge that I choose to store. I do not want or need for material comfort in this dimension (addiction, hunger, thirst, bathroom, etc.).
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Practical immortality - I only age or die if I choose to. My memories are retained even during manipulation of my form. I can choose to regenerate or ahem degrade my body to any age I have attained. Any injury or illness sustained that would render me incapable of using my brain would instantly teleport me to the nearest city center with phone and wifi, clothed, out of danger, sober, clean, maxed out on material comforts, at age 25 with my two pocket dimension rings on either index finger. If a finger has been lost, the ring will be on the next finger over. If the hand is lost, then it will be in my pocket and still capable of being evoked. If, for some reason, there is no city center with both wifi and phone network, it will prioritize wifi and then phone, and if neither are available, then I will be teleported to the most populated city center on Earth. I will be equipped with a phone with three emergency contacts that is capable of using the local network, the equivalent of $300 USD in 2025 in the local currency, 10gb of wifi data, a valid passport, and a translation app if necessary. If I feel I am in danger or imprisoned I can choose to unstuck myself with this same effect. If I am imperiled upon respawn it will take me to the geographically next closest city over in the same conditions. Any injury, illness, or mental illness sustained can be regenerated via intention.
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- Some type of super healing where my body knows what the optimal way to exist is and constantly adjusts to be there. (no chronic back pain, broken limbs set and heal, cancer gets gone, eye sight is best humanly possible etc.)
- I always have the money needed for any given circumstance in my money holder. (I could invite all you weirdos out for burritos and have enough to pay, or just go and cry in a whiskey neat and have the ability to pay)
- Beloved supreme dictator of the world. Pretty simple really
I want my foreskin back because I want the feelings they cut out of me at birth without my permission.
I want gay marraige to be recognized in Indonesia so I can move there with my husband and fuck off of Amerikkka and live somewhere nice that doesn’t have freezing cold and snow and not a conservative KKKristian shithole.
I want enough money to live realtively comfortably to fuck off, enjoy the world, and not have to answer to a clock or a boss and office drama bullshit.
Nice try. You’re not stealin’ MY wishes
Ok now for some actual selfish wishes
Wish 1 Practical Immortality – No aging, no disease, no accidental deaths. I only die if I choose 2
Wish 2 (this ones for the Posadists) Full command over a high-tech Alien Invasion Fleet - Also has the implication that there are now 100% Aliens out there
Wish 3 Mindcontrol (All shall bow before their eternal empress) No but seriously with this I can make the world leaders who wont step down from my ayy lmaos bend the knee peacefully and avoid most of the large scale warfare . Time to start humanities golden Age I guess. I will be a merciful godess. I promise
Finish my degree
Some reasonable amlunt of.money $10M-$50M
A variety of fulfilling jobs that suit my skills and interests that i can pick between until i see fit to retire. All 24 hours a week fulltime of course
Ability to drink and eat whatever I want with no negative health affects.
10 mil.
Increase my charisma by like 10 points so I can [redacted by VolCel police].
The VOLCEL POLICE are on the scene! PLEASE KEEP YOUR VITAL ESSENCES TO YOURSELVES AT ALL TIMES.
نحن شرطة VolCel.بناءا على تعليمات الهيئة لترويج لألعاب الفيديو و النهي عن الجنس نرجوا الإبتعاد عن أي أفكار جنسية و الحفاظ على حيواناتكم المنويَّة حتى يوم الحساب. اتقوا الله، إنك لا تراه لكنه يراك.
I wish I was a little bit taller
I wish I was a baller
I wish I had a girl who looked good, I would call her
I wish I had a rabbit in a hat and a bat and a '64 ImpalaYou wished for a wish too much you are now thumb (though taller thumb, baller thumb, with a girl who looks good thumb)
Jokes on you, I’m English, I was already a thumb
I’d wish to be happy (gommulism)
And for your other two?
save em for a rainy day.
maybe one could be to erase myself from the irminsul when i get tired of everything
Make me bulletproof
Give me legendary fighting skills
…put 3 in the pocket for later use
I would just go around beating up cops
I feel like this could’ve easily been the plot to Luke Cage if the writers weren’t a bunch of fucking libs
Bulletproof is not taser, batton, fire, chemical, blunt force trauma proof.
Just ask for practical immortality and you can do the same safer.
I’d wish for communism (it’s the system which benefits me the most)
No climate change (it’s in my best interest that the world does not continue to burn)
Immortality (because the world I wished for is the ideal paradise and would be better than whatever the fuck happens when you die.
With immortality there’s always the issue of being 100% guaranteed to spend centuries buried under dirt though.
That’s just an opportunity to reflect and experience ego death. Not entirely a bad thing
I wish for communism, because most work feels like bullshit
I wish for a dictatorship of the proletariat, because I had being led by sociopaths.
I wish for a red army, because I hate that shitty people have so much power.
My body cannot get damaged other than aging. Can do hella drugs without ruining my brain, and I will be cured of my chronic physical disabilities
No more insomnia, this is ruining my life for the past decade
A couple million USD
I’m a simple person, my physical and mental disabilities and need to work are like 99% of the problems in my life
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I wish that every species in the animal kingdom becomes immune to violence inflicted by humans.
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I wish that humans can develop magical abilities that strengthen with their willingness to empathize with other living creatures.
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I wish that everyone had the ability to learn the language of another person after a day of spending time with them.
Good wishes! Sadly you are now a thumb. The wishes are still granted though, so you’re the thumb of a vegan instead, which could be worse. And people will be able to learn your thumb language.
Would bacteria, fungus, parasites and viruses be covered by your first point? Cus that could be a major problem
abysmal reading comprehension tbh
Average communist who has claimed they’ve read Kapital
I’m using my wishes to turn the world into a magical setting and not setting myself up to be a healer, which I would do if magic existed and people were still fucking things up.
I wouldn’t say abysmal, but convoluted.
Basically I want magical powers and to see what kind of world we can have where caring about others is a superpower.
Fantastic! No longer thumb
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