Something about there being a record of what I said that can be checked and rechecked as many times as wanted gives me mad anxiety. Like they can analyse just how weird I talk. With a phonecall, all that remains is memory, and that makes people way more inclined to give me the benefit of the doubt.
Sometimes I take half a day considering just how to address and sign an email. There’s such intricate expectations there and no cues from them that would allow me to adjust as needed. It’s just guessing with zero clues. At least when I get an immediate response to anything I say I can adjust as I go and kind of match their tone.
Don’t get me wrong, I find calls stressful too, but at least the stressing is over when it’s done. It’s more of a ripping the band-aid off kind of stress. The barrier of actually doing it is higher, but at least i can’t really spend all day putting my energy into it as I do with an email.
You’ve put it so well, this was really helpful. Thank you!
I guess I kind of wanted to find people who relate so I don’t invalidate myself, but what you said already helps against self-invalidation!
You’re welcome! I can certainly empathise with wanting to find people who have the same experience. If it helps at all, whilst I don’t experience the struggle you do with composing emails, another person I know definitely does. Don’t know if they prefer phone calls, though.