Stalin'sSpoonHolder

My wife and I got into a huge fight over politics. In the fight I learned that she talks about me with her older brother who is a USA Navy vet with a liberal degree in History and Political science by her screaming at me that “my brother is right, you’re just a fucking Stalin worshipping tankie.” Says I’m ignoring history in that “he killed millions.”

I deserved being screamed at. I made a jab at her not doing anything to help the political situation because she refuses to go out with me to DSA or CPUSA, but she just started doing the “red card” thing that she learned from radlibs like this blond white woman who’s a lawyer (I can’t remember the name). Which is not enough and wont work for very long (her brother and I agree on that), but she has massive clinical depression right now, and she needs to find something to make her feel useful.

This is the fourth time we’ve fought over politics. She doesn’t like to talk about politics with me because I always steer it to democrats being fuckers, which “is a very MAGA thing to do.” Then she’ll blame me and “do nothing” Jill Stein voters for making Trump happen. I shit on dems so much to show how complicit they are, but she’s “already aware they are terrible people (except Sanders and AOC) but at least they are trying.”

I am the one who continues to push for us to talk about it, because we are both alone in our reading. It’s something that we need to talk about. She would be an excellent communist as her literal ideal world is communism, but she won’t detach from the liberal safehaven. I’ve said somethings that I believe have made her think for a second. It looked like she was listening when I talked about why I want to get into armed training, but doesn’t understand why I have to be the one. I feel as if she heard me when I said “I don’t want to be violent, I’m a scrawny ass teacher. There were people in the past revolutions who didn’t want to either, but your freedom is not given, it’s fought for.”

She wants to read Why Women Have Better Sex Under Socialism by Kristen Ghodsee after I’m done with that. I think it would help a bit, but I sometimes feel like I’m reading a radlibs take on the ussr and Stalin, which I think would make my wife double down. Some other comrades have said the author is a communist but advocates for eurocommunism, iirc.

I’m just venting. I don’t really know what I’m gonna do at this point. She doesn’t want me to leave, I don’t want to leave her, so it’s a matter of coming to an agreement and setting boundaries for political talk. I don’t feel like we’re comrades. It’s mostly my fault. I assume that she isn’t aware of how evil dems are, and so I get condescending. I’m not being a good husband and listening to her worries. I’m glad I have therapy soon…

Is there any other tv show or movie that goes into revolutionary mindset like Andor?