• 15 Posts
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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: July 19th, 2023

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  • Please correct me if I’m wrong or missing something important! I know people have brought up good points in the past about this.

    I do not want to touch Facebook with a ten foot pole. Some people are network-effected into using it at least sometimes. Maybe their volunteer group uses it and only it to coordinate, and as I’ve learned from trying to get people to move off Reddit to the Fediverse, telling the group to move is easier said than done.

    I’d imagine things that can talk to Facebook allow them to carry on talking to whoever they need to talk to on Facebook without actually being on Facebook, and while giving support to some type of Facebook competitor that is not quite as corporate.

    Of course, there are concerns over things like Embrace, Extend, Extinguish, and if allowing them access to us is just making it easier for that to happen. But I imagine that is the thinking behind why some people do choose to federate.


  • People you know in real life.

    I mostly left the platform over a bunch of little things that pushed me away (Explore feed going from friends of friends—things I’d care about—to ads and meme pages full of hot takes that would not get off no matter how much I put “Not Interested”; Shopping tab instead of Notifications; Reels existing in general, etc.) but I still have the account.

    It has some nice pictures of me and my friends that time ate the original copies of because I was like 10 and not perfectly diligent about making backups, and that I have not gotten around to saving the Instagram copy of yet. (Now that I say this I probably should!) There are some people I talk to over Instagram Direct Message because I do not have contact information for them otherwise and I like them enough to maintain the relationship but we’re not close enough for me to feel okay requesting a phone number. And finally, I have all those saved posts and tutorials that I never got around to and that I swear I’ll get around to someday.

    When I check back in to talk to some of those people I see other people I know in real life posting pictures from their personal life. You could argue they are advertising an image of themselves, how great they have it, etc. but some people are just posting their life—including the not-so-pretty struggles like that they just got diagnosed with cancer. And this is how I find out that some acquaintances had some major life event happen—and although we’re not close enough that I was invited I do hope that little “congratulations!!” comment I leave on their engagement picture makes them feel a little more seen, remembered, and appreciated—I know it would make me feel that way.

    I get the narrative is Instagram Bad, and I completely get why—I heavily decreased my usage of it for a reason—but that does not mean all the people left on there are also bad or Fake and Bad Overly Image-Obsessed Human Beings Making Your, Yes Your Self-Esteem Worse. I do wonder if Instagram would have acquired all these things I dislike if Meta did not buy it.

    I realize I am essentially network effect-ed into it, even if I touch it maybe for five minutes a week.

    Lemmy is not very private either but there are no corporations trying to sell my data, and I appreciate that. I spend much more time here than I do on Instagram. On the other hand, Instagram lets me bar off pictures taken in my neighborhood, pictures of me, pictures with some tiny detail that some weird stalker could use to figure out my location somehow, from anyone I don’t manually approve as a follower—so it feels much safer to post andioop’s personal life stuff there than it is to post on the Fediverse. I’ve been intending to look more into ActivityPub but as far as I know almost nothing (including Direct Messages) is private here. Maybe I should look into some kind of more private social network app actually meant for peoples’ personal life (I also recognize Lemmy’s purpose is not that) and try to pull my circle there?




  • Queer nonwhite woman, I really really hope I am just overreacting. Nothing bad happened to me personally at all during the first Trump presidency, and I hope that privilege and/or good luck holds out.

    And even still, that is just my selfish emotional reaction which is entirely controlled by what happens to me? and not at all by the fate of more at-risk people. Even if I make out well, that does not mean other people will continue to have their rights respected. I really hope that we’re all overreacting, because being wrong and annoying online is so much better than being right and having things go very poorly for us in reality.

    Although I understand how negativity and doom and gloom online, even justified doom and gloom, can get to you. I, as a member of several demographics likely to be affected, would also like to stop hearing about this all the time. It is certainly not helping me cope or do anything productive about the situation. Especially when it invades spaces that were very topic-focused and that you did not expect to be dooming and glooming about world events. I’ve had that happen to me and it was very very frustrating. In an ideal world I’d care and be mad and fight against whatever injustice is happening, but in reality I often have no more capacity to care because there are so many issues to be outraged about and to care about and causes to fight for that you get burnt out, spread too thin, too much negativity. I pick and choose my battles and close my ears to other ones, and I’ve decided that is ultimately okay because I need to do this so I have enough capacity to fight any battles at all.

    I do take the strategy of trying to keep to topic-focused places. I never explore All and on most instances I’ll also avoid Local, because even without politics there is probably some depressing meme about how the world sucks that’s on Hot. Instead I keep to my topic-focused communities. I curate my online experience so I can avoid that kind of thing. (And if these kinds of memes make you laugh or otherwise feel better, then more power to you! This is aimed at people who it makes feel worse, like myself.) And if depressing world news starts to invade places not designated for world news (even if only in comment sections and not the general posts)… at this point, I’d just say screw it and go to places way more likely to be free of this. Hello new recipe, hello webpage for learning a new programming language; goodbye social media in general. (Yes, I recognize that replying on Lemmy is not exactly avoiding social media. I took a calculated risk by going on programming.dev, a topic-focused instance I deemed less likely than other social media to have this. You see how it turned out, especially given I chose to click on this post at all, let alone read the comments and reply. But even still I would bet programming.dev has less doom and gloom about world news than more general purpose instances of comparable size.)

    I get people need spaces to feel their feelings about world events, to talk them out, to bring them up when relevant. People also need spaces free of this kind of talk and those are increasingly getting harder to find as more people feel hopeless and need to express it somewhere and oh look, this community does not have rules against it… I empathize a lot with the person you replied to, as someone who is also trying to avoid that kind of doom and gloom content. I know perfectly well that both people like and unlike me are having an awful time and often in ways that I cannot do anything to stop (in the sense that, say, donating to a domestic abuse charity and volunteering helps victims but it also does not stop that specific victim in that specific place from suffering RIGHT NOW—you can often do something to help in some small way, but your individual power is indeed limited), I do not need constant reminders to ruin my day, thank you very much.

    I usually try to feel my feelings and then look for what I can do about a situation, but this one had me too overwhelmed with the feelings to remember my second step of doing something about it, so I thought I might mention at least one thing people can do about it that I found (I guess this paragraph is less specifically directed at anyone in the above chain and more at others reading the thread). Volunteering with charities or organizations meant to help certain affected demographics such as people of color, women, and queer people, is a nice way to gain back some sense of control, and is supposed to make you feel good, but I understand not everyone has the time or capacity to do that. Donating to causes can also help if you have the money but not the time. A quick online search for what you can do given x situation might be helpful.








  • Aside from proper backups (I have cloud and local) I’ve actually been doing this for a while albeit in a pretty rudimentary fashion. I’m pretty happy with my existing categorization. I am looking to make it more robust than a copy on an external hard drive + YouTube for big videos/a cloud storage service, especially since I have hit the point where I need to get myself some more storage.



  • Are you kidding ??? What the **** are you talking about man ? You are a biggest looser i ever seen in my life ! You was doing PIPI in your pampers when i was beating players much more stronger then you! You are not proffesional, because proffesionals knew how to lose and congratulate opponents, you are like a girl crying after i beat you! Be brave, be honest to yourself and stop this trush talkings!!! Everybody know that i am very good blitz player, i can win anyone in the world in single game! And “w”esley “s”o is nobody for me, just a player who are crying every single time when loosing, ( remember what you say about Firouzja ) !!! Stop playing with my name, i deserve to have a good name during whole my chess carrier, I am Officially inviting you to OTB blitz match with the Prize fund! Both of us will invest 5000$ and winner takes it all! I suggest all other people who’s intrested in this situation, just take a look at my results in 2016 and 2017 Blitz World championships, and that should be enough… No need to listen for every crying babe, Tigran Petrosyan is always play Fair ! And if someone will continue Officially talk about me like that, we will meet in Court! God bless with true! True will never die ! Liers will kicked off…






  • Curious what you contribute to such that you have not had a bad experience, since I see people talk of bad experiences with the people in FOSS on every thread like this, and since you were downvoted for sharing your personal experience which, as far as I can tell, seems to be on-topic and civil with no hint of rudeness or “your bad experience definitely never happened/was your own fault”.

    Speaking as someone who also has no/few bad experiences with certain situations where the majority’s experience (at least that I have seen online) is having a lot of negative encounters, so I believe you. I ask because maybe people who want to contribute to FOSS can try contributing to the (type of) things you do too ;)

    I have no idea what you contribute to but thank you for your work!