This is amazing. I had never seen this before. Thank you for sharing.

Not being coy: can you help me understand the word choice of “opportune”?

I’ve recently become fascinated by history and the underpinned stories that really get to the answers to the WHY questions.

I logically know this, but I just can’t seem to get past it. Hence the question as the title.

I’ve invested quite heavily in therapy, both individual and group in the past couple of years.

One of the biggest things that I’ve come to realize is that despite my PO parents saying I was their priority they failed to move towards me when I needed them most. It’s their lack of attunement that hurts.

Yep. Distance is different than cutting him off. I have a ton of guilt. We recently had our first child and he hasn’t met his grandchild.

Yep, been doing that for a few years.

It’s not. I promise. I recently made this account because my others were too identifying of me.

Thanks for your empathy and understanding.

I try to talk about this in therapy but I still seem stuck. I wake up in the middle of the night angry, sad, and crying.

Even trying to set boundaries and communicate them to him leads me to rage and sadness. For years I didn’t recognize that when I’ve spent any time with him it usually takes several days to come back to being fully regulated. I could probably recover faster now that I’ve been to therapy, but I’m frozen in fear that he’ll try to use his wealth to try to control me and the decisions I make for my family.

Thanks for sharing your story.

Why would you want to fix it if he constantly pushes your boundaries purposely?

Because he’s my father and, naturally, I want a relationship where he will be a part of my life.

If he didn’t contact you on your wedding, was he invited?

Yes, he was invited.