"OK, google. Play the “rocking that dick” playlist.

No, let him. He is trying to help us.

My favorite clean joke, what do call a ship on the ocean floor that twitches? A nervous wreck.

" I can’t fire my rifle! My hand is cramped up!"

I think he just mooned the camera. But since this is Clowngress, it could be his ballsack.

Exactly! Same thing happened to a girl I used to know. She had two cactuses, put one on a window behind a curtain and forgot about it. The other, in full view, she kills it with her love. She finds the other thriving when she is packing up for a move.

To shreds, you say.

See, what people don’t realize, cactus thrive on neglect.

Wait? Is the cybertruck a shitty electric camino?

Edit: deleted second electric

This wouldn’t be half as funny if I wasn’t married.

Can you imagine if Nebraska Spiderman was more like a wolf spider? Just jumping out at MFs.

Black roof country, no gold pavements, tired starlings

Right? Throw in a “I have spine, but no arms or legs. Sometimes, I have dog ears.”

But is it as good as Cheddar Goblin™ brand maccaroni?

What about the donkey teeth?

https://youtu.be/3zDHSLDY0Q8?si=M1xO-xHCbKjFText

When you read this comic, does the spider have a masculine voice or a feminine voice? I feel like it changes the context a little.

Like anything, You have to pay extra for that…

Or maybe strapped to a tree in a forest full of hungry horny grizzly bears. Is that better?

Hello, fellow dog percussionists.