I think that’s a good goal, and reasonable if you’re going to be spending time with family (me too! I am too!), and good to keep up the habit of writing during both the week and week-end.

Anyways. here’s a link I hope will work :)

Woooo! We’re doing it - sharing our writing! I’m so excited. :D Okay, on with the feedback:

I didn’t really think about the writing tense, so I’d say it fits.

It doesn’t feel too strange at all. I think the strangeness of the dream opening works in its favour. To your other question, maybe it does feel a bit ungrounded? I’m not sure, I feel like the protagonist’s yearning to integrate with the robotic intelligence is the grounding, but it’s only stated in the last sentence, so hard to tell from this sample.

I agree, it’s a great opening line. I like this kind of dreamy, poetic writing, so opening on a subjective works for me. I was a bit confused by the outline of silver light, and had to read that part a couple of times (not unusual for me). My unsolicited hot take is that it’s perhaps missing a simile, just to give the mind’s eye something to picture. But that’s just me backseat writing lol :P definitely follow your own intuition first, if this ambiguity is part of what you had in mind.

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To change your text colour in etherpad, you go to the top-right of the screen and click the icon that looks like 3 people. Then you press the circle next to your name that’s the same colour of green. I just use it to paste my work into for sharing right now, but I could see how it would be neat for more collaboration. Like for example, I see there is a plugin that would let us leave comments on each others’ stories! That would be cool imho.