I wrote this some moments ago, trying to describe what I was feeling. Sometime I get in this state where I’m anxious af but I’m also sort of calm. I don’t really know how to explain it.
I feel like I have to keep myself together. Slow movements, short steps, a bit crooked, I tremble. My muscles are tense. Every problem I can think about is solvable, and yet I have this feeling that there’s something big I’m missing. What if I get something wrong? It’s the end. I feel like I’m falling to pieces. I’m going on by dint of duty: I have to send that email, I have to eat. I finish something and there is always something else, and it always has a deadline. I feel like I have to keep myself together.
Hello from a fellow anxious being. I have a lot of notes about anxiety. It is who we are or have become in response to the world. Anxiety is only trying to tell us that everything is important, make sure we didn’t forget anything. Yes, it can drive us insane, and yes, there can be mental breakdown following anxiety overload, but it is still just our constant reminder to keep our eyes and ears open at all times. The simple idea that in any sport you must always keep your eyes on the ball and finer details of the game. Anxiety is strength not weakness.
I will add this - release your anxiety by loosening your body (esp the hyper activity in the frontal lobes of your brain & temple/jaw areas), once you know it’s a mental state, you say come to here and now, & now it’s party time or whatever you want.