First United submitted a cash bid of $3.5 million dollars. By contrast, Cicack said, The Onion’s bid contained only $1.75 million in cash, alongside a waiver from the Connecticut families setting aside any of their earnings from the auctioned assets.

But Cicack challenged the use of this waiver, arguing it was “conditional and contingent” and “the equivalent of ‘monopoly’ money” and “simply has no value.”

All money is monopoly money. It’s all fake paper that has no intrinsic value, because the true value is what everyone agrees on. Their waiver ensure more monopoly money to the plaintiffs than your monopoly money bid.

You lost. Shut up. Go home.